I’m weary and tired today. Mom has annoyed me a little bit. It’s all fine, or will be. But she can be a very stubborn woman. At times it’s like hitting my head against a brick wall. She has like 15 people – professional and family — telling her what she has to do to get better. But she can’t seem to get the connection between exercising her body and getting well. She thinks if she rests in the chair, she will get better. One day she is just miraculously going to stand up and be healthy again.
I started this blog as a journal for me as I care for my mom. I know some family members are now reading my posts, and that has caused me to edit some of what I might write. But sometimes I just need to say what’s really in my head and on my heart. Some days I might just need to express a little frustration. And that doesn’t mean that you need to help or be concerned. I’m ok. We’re ok. I just need to write it down.
And today I’m just weary.
I know the feeling, believe me. Caregiving is hard and sometimes exhausting work.
Your use of the word “weary” reminded me of an amusing exchange with my mom a couple weeks back. I came to visit and found her lying in bed in the middle of the afternoon. I asked if she was feeling OK, and she mumbled something that sounded like. “I’m OK. I’m just weird.” Puzzled, I asked her to repeat what she’d just said. “Weary, ” she said. “I’m just weary.” When I told her I thought she said she was weird, she got a chuckle out of that.
Thanks for sharing 🙂 We do need to smile at some of this….. bittersweet stuff.
It’s great to find others out there in the blogosphere. Sometimes writing down and sharing helps, but it can be hard to cope with the weariness, which can lead to total exhaustion. In my case I know it’s caused by stress and then a holiday becomes an essential, not even a luxury.